The Secret Lives Of Introverts

I wanted to stay lying in bed reading this book instead of going into work. I have many mornings where I would prefer to just immerse myself in the book I am reading instead of going into my job in a collections based call center. I understand that the money for this newly released paperback comes from my work and I keep moving my feet forward.

But this is not an uncommon dilemma for people with my temperament. I am an introvert. I have gotten people saying things like "does this mean you don't like people?" And I have to explain that I actually love to socialize but I prefer the kinds of conversations that are had meeting people one on one for happy hour and that when I am around crowds of people I love just people watching. The other one I hear a lot is "but you really aren't shy," and then I have to explain that there is a difference between being confident in liking quiet and making my opinion known when it seems appropriate. Or some people will say "you aren't a part of the introvert club" because I am not really a homebody or into doing crafty things and because I thrive off of events around the city. All of these people are wrong and The Secret Lives of Introverts is a reminder of what introversion is and isn't.

The The Introvert Advantage was like a bible to me and I loved Susan Cain's Quiet. But it had been a long time since I had visited anything remotely related to personality theory because I always hated the way it would get misinterpreted. I had talked with extroverts who don't prepare presentations very well because they are comfortable "shooting from the hip" and introverts who used introversion as an excuse to not attend meetings or staying in touch with people. I always felt it was somehow missing the mark.

And actually with a lot of things relating to the Myers Briggs I never really felt like
I was ever strongly one way or another on many aspects of it. The only thing that seems repeatedly true for me is introversion.

What I loved about this book was the repeated "aha" moments I had. While it did not have any information I hadn't previously encountered it had been a long time since I had claimed the word introvert for myself.

My biggest pushback in general is that talking about what is "right for your type" can sometimes just sound like an excuse for not doing the work that life requires. And I also think that passion for something and willingness to learn something can speak louder than what a personality "type" may be. However the acknowledgement that introverts process things in a more quiet way, need a more intimate kind of connection and have a different style of leadershipis what this book does well.

Sitting the corner of the Minneapolis skyway finishing the book on my lunch break from the call center I work in was a great way to recharge my introverted brain.